10 things that annoy me

1. Excessive use of bad English

Unless it's intentional or an accident.

Well, I don't mind seeing a little. But the most obvious mistakes are spreading like epidemic disease such as "Dateline" (supposedly 'Deadline'), "Your" (When it's supposed to be "you're"), and a bunch of confusions between singular and plural terms and tenses. Tell you what, when you're unsure of your grammar, you can always check in Microsoft Word. If you're too sure that your grammar is correct (although it isn't), then... *shrugs*. Also, the spelling. Word can help you with that too.



Oh yea, if you don't have a dictionary, or too busy going online to flip through it, you can always go to Dictionary.com. It provides thesaurus and several other facilities too!! Use it wisely.

So... you guys kind of... wasted paying your English teacher for nothing. Don't you feel guilty?

2. Worshipping "Love"

I may offend some of my friends about this. I do have personal grudge against this 'love' thing, but it's not just because of my ex, but also a collection of my own observation.

okay, I don't mind if you keep your relationship in moderation, especially when you're still unmarried to your significant other. But geez... just watching or listening someone talking about his/her lover like he/she's your god makes me think negatively. It goes like this "yeah, you may say it now. But in 10 years you'll forget about those sweet talks" - be it a happy marriage or not. But the infatuation will dampen as time passes. Right now you may know each other like the back of your hand, but after marriage, you seem not to know each other anymore. It's reality.


They tend to forget who's the one(s) who are always there for them.


I'm not saying this because I like it, I say it based on my observation.

If you dislike the way I think... Please prove me wrong.... convincingly =)



3. People Fanboy/girl-ing in front me of something outside my fandom

It's biased, I know. Maybe I've already done the same thing but I mostly try to avoid it. I mean, how would I understand how they feel about a certain topic which has nothing to do with me or my interest? Or trying to seduce me into the fandom? Well, the more you barrage me even if my favourite genre is there, the more I want to avoid it. In order to get me into watching/playing/reading something, it takes time and less persuasion. I'm pretty much difficult to convince.

I don't want to offend anyone to shut up, but if I'm not heartless enough I'll shut myself up.

Or.... Please leave me out of the conversation kthxbai.

4. Listening to pointless/meaningless lyrics.

And someone asked me why I listen to songs we don't understand (Jrock, Jpop). I replied, "if you read the translation, you see how beautiful it is."

Compared to those sappy Malay songs which reuse the same theme over and over again, even if you understand it, you don't really indulge in what it means. You sing the words but dunno what the hell it means.


And not to forget international songs that worships women's body and all.



5. Popular songs goes overrated.

Once its popular, then EVERYONE likes it. There was one time I was blog lurking, I went to 3 consecutive blogs with Jason Mraz's "I'm Yours" decorating the audio. I seriously thought I was haunted! I mean, why is this song going everywhere I go?

It kind of makes me think that everyone is the same person because everyone likes the same song.


So yea, whatever's hot on the radio will be your favourite songs. You'll listen to it everyday, you sing it without even bothering about the message (if it's rapping about a chic's butt, then you rap about your fellow gender's butt - if you're a girl la).

Not just from the radio... but whatever is played on your fave TV show, or whatever you fave character is listening to... you're not sincerely liking the artistes music, are you? But for your fandom's sake. Like hell you care what the song means or how it personally relates to you either.

6. Sleeping too much.

I notice that everyone likes to write "sleep" as their hobbies. Sleep isn't a hobby, dimwits. It's a bad habit. Well, perhaps that's just my opinion while yours is different, you may consider sleep as a favourite past time activities (while Darkside LOLs at you). Playing video games like couch potato is more hobby-ful than just sleep.



I hate sleeping. I wish I can stay awake 24/7 so that I can do whatever I'm supposed to do and whatever i'm not supposed to do. Sleep is a waste of time. But I'm mere human, sleep is a need to recharge energy for the necxt day. I hate sleeping because when I want to sleep at a certain time, it'd take me minutes to hours to actually fall asleep. And I hate sleeping because when I sleep, it's hard for me to get up, I'll go back to sleep and end up oversleeping.



7. Requests to Draw Portraits

Listen up, y'all. No matter how much I love drawing, I simply DO NOT draw portraits.
For me, it's pointless to draw them. I'd consider that if I was born in the old ages. But in this era, we have this thing called CAMERA which automatically copy your exact look on paper. And now by photoshopping pictures you can make it look like a pencil drawing.

So therefore, portraits are pointless in this age. And I don't have the skill to draw portraits or something real life either. I prefer to draw what I imagine. Yes, that's a weakness. It's just my thinking that drawing portrait isn't challenging my creativity.

8. People asking me what am I doing.

Call me weird but I dislike being asked "what are you doing?" be it in real life or via YM. I really don't know why. Even if it's just wee innocent question, I take it as a threat. A threat that's about to invade my privacy. Like, when I wanna do things I don't want people to know. Which makes me wish that I am invisible. And I wish they could just ignore me.

9. Crowds and Their Attitudes

Crowds annoy the hell out of me. They take up all the oxygen I need. Hwahaha. No, seeing too many people clustered in one place makes me suffocate. Other than that, they walk in random translations, and sometimes not even watching where they're going and carelessly bump on other people. Sometimes I wished the paths in shopping complex are as organized as the road.

10. Inability to Read the Clock

Seriously, it is a bad habit to come late to meetings or classes. However, Malaysians seem to think it's an awesome thing to make a grand entrance. Not only youths do this, even the high ranking geezers have no sense of punctuality. In foreign countries, this behaviour is unacceptable. Then stop dreaming to study overseas, okay? You'll make a shame of yourself.

When an event starts at 10, please arrive be there by 10. The later you are, the less respect you get. If I were a Dato' one day, I would arrive at least an hour early. In fact, even right now I'm often way too early to class. When I'm late, I'd rather not come, because for me it is shameful to be late. but in certain classes, I purposely come in late especially if it's a boring class.

Once I was only 15 minutes late - I got a 'nice' lecture from my dad. And when he says he'll arrive in 10 minutes, then 10 minutes it is. He expects me to be ready already. Recently my sister attended a relative's engagement ceremony - the groom was late. then she concluded, if (in the future) her fiancee is more than 10 minutes late for the ceremony, she'd definitely dump him.

anyways, my point is... lateness makes me angry. You'll get a fuckin' great sarcasm from me.

------------

I've offended quite a number of people, haven't I? Forgive my harshness, but this is just my opinion. Ignore it if you dislike my twisted mind.

A tsundere's kad raya giveaway

This is like the continuation from my Anti-hero post.

Right, so after a series of scarring people's hearts, apparently I won over Darkside. So I guess as much as I try to be heartless, I fail. D:

Vixcenn has been nagging me to apologize, at the same time Faux was too ego to let me act. Meaning that I don't have the guts to say sorry in front of people, with a seriously sentimental face.

So I wasted my gil on a bunch of Kad Raya. I haven't distributed these cards since I graduated from high school. But I guess I needed to apologize to people involved somehow, and the cards are my only medium. Especially for Aidilfitri, where Maaf Zahir Batin is pretty much the overrated theme (not that it's wrong though XD). So I took the oppurtunity to write out my feelings on paper.

I spent one hour of lecture writing a few paragraphs. Ignoring the lecturer. Lucky the hall was too big and it looked like I was writing notes. Heh.

It was a last minute work. I spent all night completing my wretched lab reports.

Just for your info, the contents of the messages are general and standard. not much difference from one another but I used different sentences and add a few thoughts regarding the person. I admit about my straightforwardness. How I hurt people even if there's something good behind me cruelest honesty. The most importnat thing is that I say "I don't expect you to forgive me, but I forgive you. Even if you've pissed me off before, I'd never hate you".

However, I distributed them almost at the end of the day telling them to read when they get back home.

Friend: Can I read now?

Me: No you can't!!!!

Friend: why not??

Me: It's embarrassing!

Yikes, there's no way I wanna see their response after reading it... in front of me or so. I'd like them to read after all the goodbyes before the holiday starts, so that I don't need to face them or pretend that I didn't do anything nice *blushes*. This evening was the best time to do so. Yea well, they see me as the antagonist what...

Too bad I didn't get to write to everyone I know. Time is an enemy.

Selamat Hari Raya to my Muslim brothers and sisters. May God bless you :3

Kenapa aku tak nak "Couple"

Di sini aku ingin menulis dalam dwibahasa. Mungkin rojak. Dan juga aku nak bagi sikit warning. At the end of this post you may see how twisted my mind is and I do expect a lot of you to try and neutralize my thoughts. But I let me tell you first that I won't give a damn about your opposition, so don't even bother with your 'shallow' advice. I won't listen.

[gambar utk hiasan je lol]

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Firstly, I don't really deny that I may be able to like someone. I have a crush, I get attracted to hot guys, I'm infatuated by fictional bishonens/pretty boys, and I have favourite male celebrities. However, that does not necessarily mean that I desire a relationship with a guy. And that does not mean that I'm homosexual either. And I don't deny that I like seeing romantic relationship between characters which are not real. It's just a scary thought to be in one. And when I observe real life ones, I can't help but to have a bit of doubts (though in my heart I pray for their happiness).

Dulu aku pernah couple. Nasib baik orang yang aku suka tu yang confess kat aku dulu. 4-5 tahun dulu aku dah ada twisted opinion about couple2 ni. Tapi oleh sebab tak boleh tahan perasaan, aku terima declaration dia. Bila dah couple, tak rasa cam couple pon. aku tak tau samada dia serius ke tak. Dah ler tak call, tak mesej. Makin murung aku sebab tak dilayan. Aku tension gak nape dia nak hide sangat hubungan kita. Lepas tu pulak, hanya berlagak cam couple bila jumpa, bila tak jumpe mcm dilupakan terus.

Aku pulak cam bodo. Kononnya nak terima pasangan aku seadanya. Segala benda tak elok dia tak buat, dan segala kebaikan dia abaikan - aku tak tegur pon. Apa yang aku tak puas hati, I kept it inside. Takot dia marah. Takot dia panggil aku hipokrit. Tapi oleh sebab sifat penakut ni la buat dia amik kesempatan kat aku. Dia buat camtu pon aku tak tau nak marah camne. And his self-centered behaviour caused me to defy my mom. Is that what you're supposed to look for in a partner? I felt like a toy (confirms to be true after I got dumped). All this makes me even more and more depressed, and made me think "kalo dah camni kita, bila dah kawen nnt camne lak?". And I know I'm not quite your ideal girlfriend. Aku tak terer nak manja atau gedik. Maybe I tried but I still have my emotionless/cool self. Maybe I tried too hard but failed?

After the break up, it's obvious that I got sad. Like it's the end of the world. My friends have seen how my depression affected my daily lives; now I'm ashamed of myself that they had to see me like that. I thank them for being supportive. Anyways, after breaking up, it confirms my long ago opinion of "The one who hurts you the most is the one you love most". Correct, no? I'm sure it applies to most of you. You may think that your significant other is the source of your happiness, but once s/he hurt you (even a lil bit), it's a very big deal to you. So how do I avoid from getting extremely hurt? By not showering ultimate love to any non-family members you like. Easy, no?

It's human nature to love and be loved. Yes. I know. But I think I should limit myself to one-sided love (which makes me feel genuinely happy and I'm not doing any effort to menagih cinta) and my family members love me. So what more could I ask?

okay from the God forsaken relationship, I've observed and analyzed my behaviour as a 'girlfriend'. It's just too bad that I'm not girly nor sporty, but more towards nerdy and weird in terms of psychological thinking. Pastu aku jenis tak suka share buah fikiran tentang topik tertentu, dan aku tak suka share sangat pasal benda yang aku gilakan (contoh video game apa yang sedang dimain). Cakap pasal video game, bila dah depan PS2 tu aku lupa segala manusia yang wujud disekelilingku. Looks like I prioritize video games more than a boyfriend (alah, ex aku pon bazir duit main online game, bila nak date dgn aku ckp takde duit =_=. He owes me big monehh).

Nak kata aku leh jadi gf orang dgn cara tersendiri? Then setakat jadi awek orang je la. Kalo bab nak jadi potential wife, sori la. Aku mana pandai masak. Aku tak kemas bilik. Aku suka menyendiri - entah nak layan suami kat katil ke tak lol. Bila nak kerjakan hobi aku, aku tak suka orang tengok. Aku tak suka orang persoalkan apa aku buat dan objektifnya. Soalan simple cam 'ko tengah buat apa tu?' pon sudah cukup untuk buat aku rasa terganggu.

Pastu yang tak bleh blah pasal couple ni.... sebelum ada awek/balak sume nye ok. Skali dah ada partner, satu hari tak jumpe dah rindu. Pastu bila gadoh/clash mula la fikir "I can't live without you" la blablabla. LOL I used to think that way, and I'm laughing at my past self. Lawak la jadi org ketagih cinta ni. I have ego which turns me into a tough girl. I can't live without you are for wusses. Weak. Pathetic. Useless. Ungrateful cretins. Imbecile.

You forgot - Your family is fukken there and God watches over you.

Alrighty, God comes into the paragraph.
I know I'm in no place to preach, but let me just say what I need to say. I don't care if you call me a hypocrite, because I believe everyone is one.
Bila dah bercinta dengan manusia lain, kita sering lupa Allah. Well, kadang2 tu ada korang sebut korang doakan kebahagiaan antara korang berdua daripada-Nya. Tapi kalo dah belum kawen tu, betul ke cara tu ek? Aku tak kisah la kalo korang nak suka menyukai dan kononnya pandai2 elakkan 'zina', tapi kalo dah sentuh2 tu korang mesti lupa hukumnya haram. Pastu yang xleh blah gak, baru je kapel beberapa bulan dah act like husband and wife. Contohnya dah siap plan nak namakan anak apa, nak rumah camne, nak kereta camne. Lagi2 yang perempuan jadi semangat gila nak jadi isteri terbaik. Macam dah konfem je laki/pompuan tu bakal suami/isteri ko. Lain la kalo korang dah buat solat istikharah... tapi aku tau tak ramai yg buat ni. Asal dapat, dapat la. Laki pulak, belum habis study dah nak serius giler. Belum tau keje apa kelak.

Bila dah patah hati... mula la merungut... stuff like, "God does not love me". But ask yourself first, did you love God? Itu persoalannya. Sila fikir baik2 why did you deserve that fate...

one more thing... bila korang couple... and bila korang berada di sisi pasangan anda... are you aware of the devil? Ada makhluk yang cuba nak bawak korang ke arah yang salah. Ingat tu.

And I'm not saying this just because I have only one failed relationship. Like I said earlier, I already have this kind of thinking even before I had a boyfriend. And I conclude this from my observation/analysis on others' relationships as well.

Okay, sampai la ke point nape aku taknak couple:
1. i'm obsessed with my privacy. I don't want anyone to invade my space.
2. I suck at being gedik or girly.
3. Aku malas nak risau pasal hal orang lain (kekasih) sedangkan masalah sendiri belum diselesaikan lagi. Baik aku risau pasal hal sendiri.
4. tak nak rasa depress bila dibuang. I'd rather not risk it.
5. Malas nak menagih cinta. Taknak rasa cam orang lemah.
6. Sesungguhnya orang yang menyayangi anda lebih ramai (kawan2 dan keluarga) lebih ramai daripada sekor manusia yang 'mencintai' anda.
7. Elakkan maksiat (walopun aku tau aku still buat maksiat lain). Kalo berjaya elakkan sex, tak semestinya boleh lari daripada sentuh menyentuh dan berpelukan. Geli siot. Depends on kekuatan mental/iman anda, anytime setan bole bisik kat pasangan suruh 'terlanjur'.
8. aku tak percaya laki zaman sekarang.

entah apa lagi mau tambah. ni je sempat aku fikirkan kot. (kalo ada apa2 yang lain aku edit je).

Hah. tu la. Belum masuk topik "Kenapa aku tak nak kawen" lagi. Tu dah lain citer. Ada kerajinan dan semangat aku tulis la.

And if you wanna start typing "Don't worry, you'll find your true love" then DON'T! Sebab aku dah nyampah dengan 'nasihat' tu. It's sickening. Kalo ada orang letak jugak ayat tu dan sewaktu dengannya... then be prepared to get nuclear bomb from me. I don't expect you to agree with me either.

I've voiced out my opinion. Forgive me if you're offended.

G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra [Review]

[WARNING: MAY INCLUDE SPOILER]


So i went to watch G.I. Joe during my Time Off. Alone.
But I partially wished that my coursemates were with me because there are a bunch of Physics application in the movie.

I mean, was that plasma weaponry!?
Ripcord mentioned about "Mach 6", meaning it exceeds the speed of sound (Approximately 343 meters per second), where Mach number more than 1 means it's a supersonic velocity.

Throughout the movie my mind was so focused on relating the science fiction element to the real one. For instance, the 'nanomites', in English it "eats metal". Scientifically, more like it corrodes the metal elements. Which got me to think, how is it possible to 'eat metal' because even when metal corrodes, the elements is still there, just not disappear. In modern atomic theory, atoms cannot be created nor destroyed in chemical reaction. I might have missed it, but the particles from 'eaten' metal should be scattered everywhere. Furthermore, it made me wonder how the strong bonds are broken by nanomite bites. Then most metallic materials aren't pure metals, but a compound with nonmetal or another metal. Because pure metal is physically unstable and brittle. Mixing them with other elements to form an alloy stabilizes it.

Oh yes. Scarlett did mention about a scientific theory thingy. <3 style="font-style: italic;">"Evil never looked so good". I think it's better if the Baroness remained cold and heartless, because I like twists (hope she goes back to Cobra if there's a sequel). Baroness actress isn't too pretty but she does look good with the glasses (as she's supposed to wear in the comic version). Zartan may look low profile but it's so cool that he's the master of disguise. Storm Shadow has this Asian look, and his clothes got ripped off!!! [GYISJFGYIBUDSFBCUJDB *fangirls* *drools at sexy bod and seluar koyak-rabak]. "Arashikage" lol... literally his codename.

Lastly, I've heard of false protagonist but GI Joe gives us a "false antagonist" twist. Wait, I think other story, anime or video game might have used this. We thought it was McCullen/Destro, since the movie shows a prologue on McCullen clan's fate - which may lead to the character's antagonism. But I knew beforehand that Cobra Commander is the main villain, but I totally forgot about him, or thought that McCullen will 'evolve' into Commander. but it turns out the 'right-hand man' or 'mad scientist' archtype is the "shadow king". When he got into the cobra mask thingy, it instantly reminded me of Darth Vader *dies* (even the husky voice and heavy breathing). IMO, he did a noble thing to end his sister's depression by injecting the nanomite solution into her, even if it's inhuman (I guess have a twisted mind myself). I love his quote about the fact that we need sacrifice for science thing.

I felt nothing after going out of the cinema though. There was no "OMG" reaction like after watching Transformers (I OMG-ed in during the screening because of the physics applications) and no unsatisfied satisfaction like after watching KAMI the movie. IMO, sacrification makes a story freakin' awsm. but overuse of it may lead to cliche.

It's obvious who my favourite characters are.
I love ninjas ;D

A Time for Myself

LOL there's a song called "A Time for Us"... but oh well, it's a ronery post.


Recent happenings has caused me to dive deeper into the pensieve, opening up drawers and looking into folders of my recorded personal details. Rescanning my memory card to see myself. Investigating my brain circuits to find out where or what the hell went wrong; loose screws, broken wires or burnt components.

All of a sudden I have this desperate need to be alone. There are mornings where I don't feel like going to classes, but my disciplined self tell me not to skip lessons. I don't wanna meet anybody. I was feeling ashamed to face my friends. I feel ashamed to face them because it seemed like I was just pretending that everything is okay. I want to be alone, not just sleeping in my room, but do something like walking or shopping by myself.

SO! I picked a nice day for my "Time Off" which was today. Right after statistics exam. Besides I'm too lazy to beg and kneel down in front of other people to come with me. I have my imaginary friends with me sooooooooo.. yeah.

Alang2 keluar ni, I should go look for tools and medium for my Fine Art lessons. And perhaps look for my cousin's birthday present. Which I finally found, thanks to studying a bit of katakana earlier XD. E-ru-gu-ra-n-do! My cat needs a baju raya too. Since my family will be in green this year, I bought him a green collar. <3>.<

Since I'll be wasting my time there, I thought I should catch a movie or something. I watched G.I. Joe because a coursemate of mine said there are some Physics stuff in there. I'll review it later. It's been a while since I went to the cinema. Last time was Transformers II with my mom.

And my greatest desire of the week is to eat at ZEN (yet again). So I broke my fast at ZEN with mah twins. Oyes, during waiting intervals (at Surau and at ZEN) I managed to draw a few doodles. I haven't been in touched with my artistic side for a long time (minus the Fine Art class) thanks to Physics labs. And I'm ssoooooooooooooooooooooooo happppeeeeeee to draw again!! ^___^ (ok aku dah muak makan dessert lol)

Pastu nak solat maghrib, Alhamdulillah surau tu penuh dan ramai orang beratur nak amik wudu'... tapi... don't take your own sweet time la nak amik wudu' tu... org lain pon nak solat gak. And time is running out. Kena consider laa... 5 minit sblum masuk Isyak baru aku dpt solat. Nasib baik bawak telekung sendiri. Ni belum campur kuantiti muslimah yang malas nak solat laie....

Eh, don't sympathize me la. Being alone isn't any problem to me... unlike some people. Tinggal sorang sikit dah komplen. =_= Maybe dah terbiasa. Hwaha.

But the advantages of shopping alone are.... I can walk wherever the hell i want without considering someone else's thoughts. No need to strain my brain when deciding on where to go or what to eat. No one criticizing the price on the stuff you're buying or eating (like ZEN, mahal dowh). No need to wait for other people to finish their business looking for what they want (srsly, kalo masing2 ada benda yang berbeza utk dicari, baik split up and jumpe balik bile nak makan. aku tak faham nape kita kena gerak sini sana dlm satu klompok cam ada rantai terikat kat kaki. Aku tak suke terikat atau rasa terikat. Tak selesa). No need to worry about time (bile nak balik, bile nak solat) while others are too busy shopping to look at their watches. No need to wait for each other and end up getting angry when you thought no one is waiting for you.

Disadvantages? hmmmmm..... lessee.... NONE! But... tambang taxi T__T

ha.... it's not like I hate hanging out with friends. Ada masanye seronok gak ada kawan2 leh gelak ketawa. Cuma kadang2 aku nak bersendirian. And I got my wish :3
And I wasted RM150 in one day............ TDT

My Beautifully Elegant Flower of Evil

***

My favourite song from "Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion R2, 2nd Ending.

~Waga Routashi Aku no Hana~
(ALI Project)

Dakusei wa oni seigi wa nanzoto
Tou maeni aragae yo akutoku no hana
Gizen no yume shishi me ni wa me wo sashi
Sei mo ja mo wakatareru koto nashi
[The corrupt world is a monster; "What is justice?"
Struggle against it before you ask that, oh wicked flower
Gaze at the eyes that look to a hypocritical dream
There's no such thing as being able to distinguish between holiness and evil]


Hikari wa tae taijinoyou ni
Kimi wa nemuru yami no shikyuu
Kodoku koso ito oshii
Yuiitsu no mikata to narudarou
[Light ceases; like a fetus
You sleep in the womb of darkness
Indeed loneliness is dear
It'll become your sole ally, right?]


Hitori hitori chishio ni mamire
Kono jidai ni umareochita
Erabarashi oujira yo
Tatakai koso shukuen
[One by one, they were smeared by bloodshed
And born into this era
Oh, chosen princes
Indeed fighting is a banquet]


Aa ware wa uruwashi zen chi
Ai no haha kimi wo umu
Kono chichi ni hagukumi shimono wa
Jigoku no harakara
[Ah, I am a beautiful omniscience
The mother of love gives birth to you
What nurtures you in this milk
Is your brethren of hell]


Mokushi no in shinri wa nanzoto
Shirimo sezu uzomoreshi intoku no tane
Moroha no ken nukuha ni wa ha wo muke
Mamorubeki mono dake wo shinjite
Aragamama ni kimi wa kimi wo hanate
[The mark of a revelation; "What is the truth?"
Without even knowing that, the seed is buried and concealed
With a double-edged sword, turn your sword on a pulled sword
Only believe in the things that you must protect
You release yourself as you are]


Danmatsuma no sakebi wo abite
Ranjuku seshi kono sekai ni
Momikomare i wo sogare
Tada ikiru shikabane no mure
[Swallowed and having their intent killed
By this overripe world
That bathes in the screams of their last moments
The groups of corpses merely live]


Sore wa kimi ga fumishidaku mono
Awaremukoto wa yasui keredo
Sukuwarezu sukuwareru
Uragiri no hito no michi
[That's what you stomp flat
It's easy to pity
But without being saved, you are scooped up
On the path of people who betray]


Aa ware wa routashi bitoku
Haha no ai kimi wo hamu
Kono hara ni haramitsuzukeru wa
Igyou no tsubasa ka
　[Ah, I am an elegant virtue
A mother's love consumes you
Is what continues to be carried in this stomach
A strangely shaped wing?]


Goku shi no kagi shinjitsu wa ariya
Sagasedomo hatemo nashi konton no ori
Shinpan no ya iru te ni wa te wo fure
Kyo to jitsu ga oremagari majiwaru
Yoru akerumade kimi wa kimi ni insu
[A prison guard's key; reality exists
Even if you search for it, the cage of chaos is endless
Touch the hands of the shooter who fires the arrow of judgment
The fake and the real break, bend, and mix together
Until dawn breaks, you are addicted to yourself]


Sakare yo sakeyo
Chiriisogukoto nakare
[Prosper! Bloom!
Don't be quick to fall apart]


Mokushi no in shinri wa nanzoto
Shirimo sezu uzomoreshi intoku no tane
Moroha no ken nukuha ni wa ha wo muke
Mamorubeki mono dake wo shinji yo
[The mark of a revelation; "What is the truth?"
Without even knowing that, the seed is buried and concealed
With a double-edged sword, turn your sword on a pulled sword
Only believe in the things that you must protect]


Dakusei wa oni seigi wa izukoto
Tou uyori mo sakihokore akutoku no hana
Gizen no yume shishi me ni wa me wo sashi
Sei mo shi mo kyoukai wa arumaji
Saigo no koku kimi wa kimi ni junji
Subete wo daki satoran
[The corrupt world is a monster; "Where is justice?"
Bloom fully from asking it, oh wicked flower
Gaze at the eyes that look to a hypocritical dream
There must be a limit for life and death
In your final moment, realize that you'll die for yourself
And embrace everything]

***

Scary video, beautiful yet wicked lyrics. That's the reason why I love music from Japan most. <3
Most ALI Project songs seem 'complicated' and 'rushing' and 'weird'. Somehow I like it because it's different. The Genre?

Neoclassical + Progressive Rock + Darkwave

Meet my Imaginary Friends

I'm shamelessly gonna post this and share a wee bit of my secret here.

I know I'm too old for 'imaginary friends' but I like to picture them being a busybody in my life. Well, when I'm alone of course. I don't like being disturbed. By other people. Especially when I want some privacy. But these guys are a part of me so....

At first it's just me and myself alone.

But 5-6 years ago there was this monster slowly growing inside me and I found it to become a nuisance. I dubbed it 'darkside'; the source of my negativity and anti-heroism. I blame her for possessing my body and show my evil side. That's actually equivalent to realizing that you're doing something bad/wrong. Darkside pestered me in my late teens, but now I often put it to slumber. Forever dormant in my head, now and then waking up to produce dark philosophy in my other blog. Now and then something triggered it while I am trying my best to seal it. I hate it. No. I fear it. [Theme song: "Papercut" - Linkin Park]
[Random Fact: Darkside has its own blog. Only certain individuals are allowed to read it. You do not have to be my closest or best friend to be able to access it]

Darkside also hates to be criticized. Especially when someone tries to 'normalize' its twisted quotes and thoughts, it will tell you to STFU.

Even if I realize that there's an evil part of me, there's also my egoism. I have my own ego. Often I do not want to step down as the loser and stand strong to my thoughts. I have pride. I wanna be as independent as possible, not to rely too much on other people especially men. In fact, I often assume myself as "the Man". In relation to that, I find myself being quite protective to friends - like a noble hero way. (but many should fail to see it because darkside's interference)
This is when 'the Man', Faux comes into the picture.

He goes by the rules. Punctual and disciplined. He's the smart one and he takes work seriously. He treats colleagues as fellow workers. He doubts people (a possible influence by Darkside). I put on the mask of Faux when I deal with new people. He's more rational and logical. If he sees any form of rule-breaking he'd get really pissed off. He may take things a bit too seriously that but he has a lot optimism.
[Theme song: "Beat it" - Michael Jackson]
[Primary colour: white, in contra with my black attire]
[Random Fact: "Faux" means "false" in French, supposedly pronounced as 'foe'. But you may call his name as 'forks' or 'fawkes' since I intentionally derived the name from "Fox"]

As I grow older, I realized that I have a girly side too. I barely show it. But I do drool at hot guys and cute boys. Just that I'm not freakin' desperate to be in a relationship or be wed to some guy who does not deserve me. I dislike girly things, but I like to fantasize myself wearing EGL. Too bad I'm not in a good shape for it lawl. So I drew out an ideal character to portray my stupid dreams.

Vixcenn is her name, as a result of my stupid dreams, she's a ditz. The source of laziness and naughtiness. Also the cheerful side, and only appears to those she is comfortable with. Because she's actually quite shy. She's the playful one and adapt with jokes thrown all over. She only takes over when Unfortunately, she can be a pervert. Causing Faux to be overprotective to her in case she baited any immoral acts. She's the artistic one, who preferes freedom and deters restrictions. However, Vix my sensitive side - who may go berserk via Darkside if the mysteriously wrong button is pushed.
[Theme song: "Umbrella" - Vanilla Sky]
[Primary colour: Red. Other colours are acceptable too depending on mood. provided it's combined with black]
[Random Fact: "Vixcenn" is derived from Vixen. But I fancy-fied it by making it sound almost like 'Vincent', my favourite character from Final Fantasy VII]

Ok that wraps up the introduction. the reason why I'm doing this is because they'll be (they WANT to) make a ruckus in my future posts. It's better if I give you guys a briefing on them or else you won't get what's going on.

BTW, Faux and Vixcenn are twins featured in my TWIN PARADOX PROJECT.
Here's more info on their profile. LOL cheap promotion. Thanks for viewing, in advance.